Advice: I Fucked His Best Friend

Q:
Hi, I'm married for 3 years to my husband but I got the hots for his best friend and I just had sex with him and I enjoyed it. I don't know what to do because now I kind of gotten used to want his best friend. Please, I need an advice!

A:
Well, you'll just have to get unused to it.

I'm not much of a moralist when it comes to sex outside of marriage, but this is where I draw a line. That ain't much of a best friend your husband has.

Desire is desire and it's hard to say "no" but sometimes it has to be done. You should not have offered yourself to him and he absolutely should not have accepted.

If he were a real friend he would have made you feel bad enough about wanting to step out on your man that you wouldn't have done it again.

OK, so here we are. You fucked him and you want to again. And it seems he'll certainly take you up on it again.

You should do your best to avoid being anywhere near this man, but you must not arouse your husband's suspicions. Oh, and you must never ever tell your husband what happened. If you feel guilty, that's your price to pay.

If you don't feel guilty, you need to re-examine this marriage.

Advice: Sexually Frustrated Wife

Q:
I am 21 years old and my husband is 23. We have been married for 3 years and have 2 kids. Before the kids came along my husband and I had an amazing sex life. Nothing was off limits and things were great.

Things are nowhere near that now. Now he gets me in the mood and when it seems I'm just getting started, he cums. Sex lasts 10 minutes with 8 being foreplay. I can't stand it. He says he's just so tired from working that he can't hold out and keep going. I always end up disappointed and upset with him and still yearning to have an orgasm. So I masturbate after he goes to sleep.

I don't know what to do! This is ridiculous. What do I do to get him to have sex longer? We've tried different positions to see if that prolongs sex but it just results in an extra minute or so. I'm at the end of my rope. What can I do if there IS anything I can do? Please help!

A:
I guess he's getting what he wants. Have you both not figured out there are other ways to make you happy? Truth is, many if not most women don't orgasm from intercourse even when it lasts.

The first thing you need to do is make it clear to your husband that you need to be satisfied. And that when you are satisfied, he will be rewarded. Yes he works hard but he can rise to the occasion, and you'll make it worth his while with stimulation and teasing along the way, and no pressure once you get to the screwing.

He may need to do some more work before he gets his. Though I can hardly think of it as work. But work together to find ways to stimulate you before intercourse that bring your pleasure and an orgasm -- manual stimulation, cunnilingus, toys or vibrators. So it's not just foreplay, it's your play. You should certainly be pleasuring him as part of this time.

But the idea is that you cum first. Then he gets to fuck and cum too, however quickly he wants.

It's tough to maintain that sexual spark once you have kids, and it's usually the woman that doesn't want sex as much. Since you still have the desire, make some extra effort to insert flirtation and teasing into your lives, even when it won't lead to sex right then, even with the kids around. It will build desire in him and help him remember what you had before there were kids. Then hopefully he'll be more responsive to your needs.

Advice: I Can't Come II

Q:
I really need your help. I'm not allowed to by sex toys and I just can't cum!!! I tried rubbing it really hard but I get scared and have to stop...by the way i am 18 ... PLEASE HELP! A toothbrush doesn't work either. I really want to cum! I don't have a boyfriend to help me and my parents hate sex by the way. help...

A:
Rubbing it really hard probably isn't the best way to get there. I can tell you're frustrated, but you're going to need to be calm. And relaxed. And gentle with yourself.

First, go to a drugstore and buy a lubricant such as K-Y Warming Liquid. Choose a time when you have plenty of time and aren't worried about parentus interruptus.

Get warm and cozy and naked in your bed. Don't go right for it. Take some time to appreciate how your hands feel touching yourself all over your body. Lightly brush against your nipples. If that feels good, try pinching them a little, perhaps licking your fingers and touching them to your nipples.

As you begin to get excited then, use some of the lube and start rubbing around your clitoris. Touch yourself all over your genital area. If you like having your nipples stimulated keep one hand there and the other below.

Relax into your desire. Don't go fast. Don't go hard. At least not yet. Imagine a very desirable man is with you sucking your nipples, then licking your clit, and then entering you. Imagine him fucking you and you responding.

Let your instincts take over and hopefully you'll find success.

Erotomania

I just finished reading Erotomania: A Romance by Francis Levy.

I'm a slow reader, so it took me a few weeks to get through it. During much of that time I was intensely aroused. Then I was grossed out, but intrigued. Then I never wanted to eat again.

This novel is scorchingly hot, screamingly funny and seriously disturbing.

The Village Voice had it right when it headlined its review "Read Book, Wash Hands".

The story begins with a couple who have sex daily, are anonymous to each other, and cum so hard they suffer temporary amnesia each time.

Their relationship progresses (?) from there.

It's a hell of a great read.

Advice: Licking Your Own Lollipop

Q:
hi there long time reader first time writer. I have been wanting to try and give myself oral pleasure for a while. after a few min of trying my bk hurts and i have to rest. I am 26/m i have wanted to taste myself for quite some time. Can u help me and tell me some easy tricks to help me with my desire/problem?

A:
I assume this is a man writing. They key to success is the right combination of flexibility and penis length.

There are several positions to try, all easily found on the internet by searching "autofellatio".

I recommend you take up yoga with at least weekly classes and a daily at-home practice. It will teach you to stretch in new and effective ways.

Advice: HIV & Oral Stuff

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Advice: Lasting Longer

Q:
I am Mirthula 25 yrs old girl from India. Please give tips for prolonged erection and long time intercourse. My partner mostly cum very fast and sometimes not able to maintain erection for a long time. Please advice

A:
There are a number of techniques that you can try. One is called "stop-start". If your partner can identify the moment before he reaches a point of no return, you should both stop moving until the urge subsides, then start again, then stop again several times. One benefit is that for some men, their orgasm when they finally have it is much stronger. You might even test this method as a way of giving him a hand job, where you are more in control. If you can learn the signs of him getting close, you can not only stop moving, but apply pressure to the head of his penis for a while. When he relaxes a bit, start over.

Also, if when you begin intercourse he is thrusting rapidly, an idea is to just slow it down. Calm, slow movement enhance the sensuality and should make the experience last longer.

Assuming your partner is young like you are, he can probably regain an erection fairly soon after ejaculating. Why not give him a hand or blow job first and then move to intercourse for a second round. If he is a generous lover, he should return the favor. He can go down on you while he's waiting to get his hard-on back. Not that you want to get into counting orgasms, but it's the least he can do!

One more technique he can try: as he's getting close to orgasm he should squeeze his pelvic floor muscles. It's the same action he'd use to stop urinating. Exercising those muscles, often called Kegels, has many benefits.

Advice: Yes You Can... Catch Something

Q:
Now that i am old enough i have been experimenting with lots of different things. One of the things i have just been trying is oral sex... and i must admit that i love it. About a month ago a friend took me to an adult theater. Oh my god! To make a long story short, i ending up sucking off 3 guys in the back of the theater and swallowing their sperm. Now i go every chance i get and always end up with several loads of sperm in my belly, i am addicted. Of course i am worried about what could happen. my question is: do i have to be worried about AIDS or other STDs? What is your advise ? thankyou.

A:
The simple answer is that yes, you are at risk for acquiring HIV or certain other STDs. The odds of catching something are very low, but is it worth putting your health at serious risk for anonymous blow jobs?

Swallowing and spitting likely have the same amount of risk. Even if he pulls out, there's pre-cum. So the long and short of it (hehe) is: this isn't the riskiest behavior, but it's risky nonetheless.

There was a time when I was seeing two women who were both nurses, and they wouldn't put my dick in their mouths without a condom. I made sure to get some nice flavored ones.

I suggest you get a boyfriend who loves blow jobs and can come multiple times in a session. Have him tested, and if he checks out then go to the theater with him and have him pretend he's a few different guys. You'll get your kicks and he'll be very grateful.