the next best thing to hotel sex...

...is hotel masturbation.

Alone in a room, away from home and family, it's just so much easier to conjure rich fantasies. Sometimes those fantasies are fueled by women I've seen in the lobby or elevator.

Plus there is no concern about someone walking in on me, or someone needing to use the bathroom while I am, ahem, busy, or hearing voices in the house that distract me from my mission. I can relax and proceed.

If I'm going strong, I might go 2-3 times a day during a hotel stay, while at home I'm a once-a-day guy at best.

I am very respectful and do not shoot seed on carpet, bedspread or other fibers. Remember that TV show a few years back where they used ultra-violet light to discern semen on the bedspreads in hotel rooms? Gross. Ever since then, when I check into a room I immediately pull the spread off the bed with as little direct contact as possible.

If I want added inspiration, I bring a magazine. No, not porn, not Playboy. I bring Cosmo. The sex stories are better than Penthouse Forum and there are lots of great fashion and underwear articles and ads. Plus I always enjoy reading what men really want in bed.